Adequate Substitutions
By H.E. Belle
A trickle of burgundy drips into the bubbling cauldron as the necromancer wrings the bloated cheesecloth.
As the gnarled, hunched man shuffles across the room to his stores, Ty leans over and whispers in his wife’s ear. “I’m not sure about this.” They watch as the necromancer reaches up with his cane, nudging a dusty bottle. It teeters for a moment before crashing onto the dirt floor below.
“Hush!” His wife chastises him. “Be patient.”
Ty shifts his weight as the necromancer kneels to scoop the spilled contents into his hand, along with a great deal of dust. “I don’t know… A vegan necromancer? Beet juice instead of blood? Just because we have a gift card doesn’t mean—”
“Here we are!” The necromancer announces, suddenly appearing in front of the startled couple. He opens his fist to reveal a handful of black-eyed peas.
Ty raises a brow. “Not eye of newt?”
The necromancer tosses the handful of legumes into the bubbling pot. “Bah! Beans are a perfectly adequate protein substitute.” He stirs the mixture with a long, wooden spoon. “Yeh ever hear ‘an eye for an eye’?”
“Um…” Ty mumbles, “I’m not sure that’s what it means.”
But the necromancer ignores him, scooping out a ladle of the mixture and bringing it to the mouth of the stiff, black cat on the counter. “Midnight here will be hunting mice and playing with your daughter in no time!”
A cloud of pink and purple surrounds the cat. Whiskers quiver and paws twitch.
Well, I’ll be damned, Ty thinks. It’s working!
A bright, white flash fills the room. On the counter is a living, breathing, squeaking, black, fluffy…
Hamster.
The necromancer blinks and clears his throat. “Ahem. Is now a good time to discuss payment? Gift cards do not qualify for refunds.”
H.E. Belle is a lover of funky stories, caffeination, and em dashes. She primarily writes fantasy and speculative fiction.
Novel approach with a great twist. I really enjoyed it!